Heartset is officially HeartState

Hey {{first_name|there}},

It’s taken me years to develop the powerful two-part system that helped me and everyone I work with know what it really feels like to come home to yourself. Rewiring your nervous system and your belief system, so you can get safe in your body, become deeply self-trusting, and feel emotionally free.

For a long time, I’ve informally called this whole framework Heartset. And recently I realized Heartset isn’t the right name. The truer name is HeartState.

Here’s the ah-ha that made it click for me. As much as I love contrasting Heartset with mindset, what I teach and practice was never about being “set.” Nothing about this practice is fixed. It’s your state of being.

I’ve long defined it as your core emotional and energetic state: how you feel and what you radiate from the inside out. Not your mood. Your baseline. If your emotions are the weather, your HeartState is your climate. It’s your life force. It’s the electromagnetic field your heart generates. Truly, it’s your vibe.

So, Heartset with Andrea is officially HeartState with Andrea. In the days and weeks to come, this addition of two letters, a and t, will ripple through my teachings, our messaging, all of it.

The concept, the practice, the methodology? It’s exactly the same. And always evolving.

Whatever we call it, the power and profound beauty of this practice become more apparent to me every single day. I feel so grateful to practice it in my own life and to share everything I learn, from my own practice and from the incredible people I work with, knowing the transformative impact these techniques have had on untold lives.

I often talk about the two roots that leave so many of us confused and full of doubt, despite being so capable, so loving, so caring.

The first root has to do with your dysregulated nervous system. So many of us were raised with some degree of chaos. Our caregivers never learned to regulate themselves. They never learned to be regularly safe and relaxed in their bodies. As a result, they could never teach that to us, and so many of us never learned to co-regulate as children. We never learned to feel truly safe and calm in our bodies, so we live in our heads instead. Overthinking. Analyzing. Performing.

The second root has to do with your belief system, and the two go hand in hand. In that same chaos, we learned that love had to be earned. We never developed the trust that we were good enough or lovable enough exactly as we were. We got programmed. And from that programming came a whole host of behaviors that kept us safe back then but don’t serve our highest good now.

One I was thinking about: the myth of hyper-independence. 👇

For decades, I wore my hyper-independence like a badge of honor. Only relatively recently did I see it for what it actually is: a trauma response.

Here’s the truth: we all need to be needed. Needing others isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of being human. It’s a sign of being vulnerable. And when we never let anyone help us, we rob the people who love us of something that feels good, and even necessary, for them: the chance to show up for us.

(To be clear, I’m not talking about codependency or neediness. Those are different animals. I’m talking about the difference between hyper-independence and a healthy, appropriate degree of reliance on other people.)

If hyper-independence is, or was, your badge of honor too, I invite you to reconsider it, along with the other quiet, programmed behaviors that are really forms of self-abandonment. Things like:

Saying yes when you mean no.

Asking for help and then immediately letting everyone off the hook: “Oh, it’s totally okay if you can’t!”

Why do we do this? Self-preservation. Somewhere along the way, inconveniencing someone became unsafe. And let’s face it: nobody likes rejection. But for some of us, even the possibility of it is deeply dysregulating. So we pre-emptively reject ourselves under the auspices of letting someone else off the hook.

It doesn’t have to be like this anymore for you.

Here’s your invitation, and it’s easier than you might expect: just notice.

With curiosity. With compassion. With allowing. No fixing required. Some of these behaviors will fall away on their own the moment you truly see them and meet them with curiosity, because you realize they serve no one. Not you, and not the people you love. Self-abandonment is fundamentally out of integrity. You deserve to honor yourself, and the people around you, by showing up fully human, beautifully imperfect, and entirely worthy.

Finally: I have long been zealous about the teachings of Lao Tzu and especially love Stephen Mitchell’s translation of the Tao Te Ching. My friend Larry Wilson gifted me my copy nearly 20 years ago, and there is SO much wisdom in it. As I like to joke, it’s the hottest new wisdom around, from 2,500 years ago. It’s been sitting right there all along. Most of us were never taught it, and neither were our parents or caregivers. Fortunately, it’s not too late.

I leave you with my latest reading. Take whatever lands, wherever it hits, and leave what doesn’t. 👇

And know this: practiced, this wisdom can have a radical impact on your life. It helps you stay present. It helps you meet adversity, discomfort, disappointment, even what seems boring or useless, with less resistance and greater receptivity. This is the path to peace, to ease, to flow, to trust.

Pondering the words and energy of the Tao Te Ching have enhanced my HeartState immeasurably.

With love, 🤍
Andrea

I love to say we’re all so much more powerful than we realize. That includes you. Including your ability to feel better day to day and to genuinely love your life. It’s why I developed HeartState for myself, and why I’m so passionate about sharing ways of practicing it with you.

Here are 4 ways you can go deeper into HeartState. And the 4th one is free.

The faster you come home to yourself, the better you will feel, and the better your life will work.

HeartState Mastery is my personalized, private 1:1 coaching program, designed for women who are tired of doubting themselves and feeling like they have to keep proving themselves, despite how smart, caring, and accomplished they are. (Yes, a few exceptional men are welcome to apply too.)

In eleven personalized, highly interactive, hands-on sessions, I help my clients go from doubting themselves and their worth to becoming Awakened Sovereigns. You will rewire your nervous system and your belief system. You will build deep self-trust, learn to love and care for yourself, and feel better than you have in a long, long time. Probably ever, if I am being radically honest. The program is designed to anchor in lasting change, and it culminates in your very own personalized HeartState Identity Blueprint.

Side effects may include: chronic peace, a renewed sense of joy, much more fun, pleasure, and beauty in your life. Oh. And a genuine sense of emotional freedom.

I have a few seats left for highly personalized 1:1 HeartState Mastery coaching. The results and breakthroughs my clients achieve are breathtaking, deeply fulfilling, and sometimes downright radical. If you’re ready to come home to yourself, book a free call with me and let’s see if we’re a good fit.

You can’t think your way home to yourself. And you were never meant to do it alone.

The HeartState Society is my membership for women (and a few exceptional men!) who are done with the hustle myth. With the proving, the performing, the self-abandonment. Here’s what you can expect: POWERFUL live monthly activations, your Daily Dose of HeartState email, live workshop-style interviews with leading thought leaders at least quarterly, peer-to-peer support and real friendships, and a community of people becoming regulated, radiant, and sovereign together. With my superstar HeartState team supporting you along the way.

As I love to say: HeartState is not your mood. It’s your baseline. My team and I designed the HeartState Society to make raising your baseline easy, fun, and rewarding. Click here to see everything you receive as a member.

Mark your calendar. 👇

This one is for women, plus a few exceptional men, ready to hit the escape button on the programming that somehow convinced you that you need to hustle, grind, and martyr yourself to succeed. It’s never been true, and it’s less true than ever.

There’s a better way to be successful and feel fulfilled, and I’m going to help you get there. I learned the hard way. Keeping it real, after decades of buying into the hustle mythology, I freed myself, and I am eager to help you do the same.

This is a 90-minute live session featuring powerful activations. It will be fun, it will feel great, and because it’s deliberately scheduled for a Sunday evening, it’s designed to send you to bed looking forward to Monday morning. Maybe for the first time in a very long time.

It’s $37, but for early birds right now we are offering access for $22. A veritable bargain for looking forward to Monday morning.

My team and I create a tremendous amount of valuable content for you, for free. Reels, posts, guided meditations, online events, interviews, and more.

I urge you to start with the free HeartState Reset guided meditation. Then subscribe to my podcast, Getting Open, where I interview many of the world’s foremost thought leaders in neuroscience, wellness, health, love, relationships, manifestation and more. PhDs and MDs from Harvard, Stanford, Johns Hopkins, UCLA, the Cleveland Clinic, Columbia, and beyond. It’s available on YouTube, Spotify, iHeart, and everywhere you love to listen.

We send this email out weekly to share all that’s cooking with HeartState. And you can find me reading from the Tao Te Ching, dancing, singing, and sharing HeartState insights on TikTok and Instagram.

Whatever you have the space for right now, I’ve got you. Whether you find a powerful sense of belonging in the HeartState Society, work with me directly in an intimate, personalized capacity, join us for the Anti-Hustle Activation, or simply keep reading this newsletter and following along on social, I am glad to be connected with you.

More joy. More peace. More of the REAL YOU. ✨🤍